Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Obviously I would not try to eat these shoes (I imagine they would taste slightly worse than wax fruit) but oh HOW I WOULD WEAR THEM. I think they'd look absurdly fetching with my lavender trench-coat from Great Coats.
I was teased mercilessly by the universe today as I discovered the existence of this color when my dear office bestie emailed me a fantastical sale- 40% off*!!!- but all that was left was size 5. Alas, my feet might be somewhat small for my Amazonian height, but not quite that freakish.
Therefore Readers Dear, if ever you so happen upon these magnificent rain boots at discounted price do be kind enough to contact me about it. I would weep with joy and model them for you, possibly even standing next to pumpkins/frolicking through a field of fallen leaves.
*They are $115USD normally, so 40% off would have put me at a more bearable $69. I've seen them on British websites for £60 which is about $99, but I'm guessing international shipping charges would rape me whether or not they're affected by the Royal Mail strike business. (Hey look at that Twitter keeps me up to date on foreign events!)
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
But more on that later.
Right now I just want to show you what you should most definitely purchase for me, Aquatic Cousin 2, if you felt like getting me a Christmas present:
Thus: shiny wellies are on my horizon. I also like the gold. I'd even be okay with purple or bright yellow.
You know, just thought I'd share. Since you didn't get me anything for my birthday. *sniff sniff* But really, that's okay. Maybe we're not yet to that stage in our relationship, Dear Readers. I understand. I can wait.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Okay not really because there's no such thing but there SHOULD BE and let me tell you- the Aquatic Cousins would be sitting in the front row, wearing things more awesome than the Olsen twins ever thought to imagine in their bobble heads.
Cat Piano shirts are all the rage at The Workplace of AC2, I can assure you.
Now, the world might not be ready for this next piece, as rocked by AC1 in a way that no one else ever quite could- but we have confidence and faith in you, Dear Reader.
No she did not skin a muppet for this fine and winning piece.
Yes I've had too much sugar and caffeine. Let's hope I hold out until our Dallas departure this evening. In the meantime, I must needs go see a communist in his cubicle about some Workplace Things. (No really, that's how he referred to himself in the email.)
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
The Aquatic Cousins typically disregard email forwards you guys- unless to laugh at the comparisons of people to pumpkins that god has 'carved out with his light' etc- but this one is important. Please read & share with those fine ladies you care about!
Important Women's Health Notice:
Please..Please forward this to all the women you care about, or at least
tell them about it. It could save a life....
With Fall already upon us and as Winter approaches. . .an important Women's Health Issue Notice
Do you have feelings of inadequacy? *
Do you suffer from shyness? *
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.
Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything. You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had.
Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas. Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.
Side effects may include:
- Erotic lustfulness
- Loss of motor control
- Loss of clothing
- Loss of money
- Loss of virginity
- Table dancing
- Dry mouth
- And a desire to sing Karaoke
* The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when
you are not.
* The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and
over again that you love them.
* The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing.
* The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically
converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
Please share this with other women who may need Margaritas.
AC1 and AC2 just want you to be healthy, wealthy and wise. Brought to you by Jazzy-J and the committee of Jack-o-lanterns for Jesus.
ETA: October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month! Feel up someone you know and love. It just might save their life.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
The Aquatic Cousins got a chance to flex their semi-aquatic muscles this past weekend, at the Austin City Limits (ACL) music festival, thanks to some torrential down-pouring of rain. This turned poor lovely Zilker park into a mudpit and made the people who put down the sod several months ago that had it so beautiful and shining mere days before most likely cry with tears of intense sadness. But those tears were probably washed away in the rain and added to the mud, so it doesn't much matter anyway.
I'm really glad I'm not one of those guys. Hey, look at me- I'm sensitive.
Friday I did not attend the festival but AC1 and Umbrella Dancing Cousin did, enjoying the lovely weather and beautiful grass before monsoon season came upon us Saturday. Umbrella Dancing Cousin, however, missed out on this waterpark-with-a-soundtrack as she decided to return to Ft. Worth and I benefited heartily by making sure her wristband wasn't lonely and got to return to the festival through Sunday. (Pictured above with AC1 and AC2 is not Umbrella Dancing, cousin; that is Blanket Cousin. She has been so named because a throw blanket was her choice of rain gear.)
Having lived in the great city of Austin for the past five years you may be surprised, Dear Reader, to discover that this was my first foray into ACL- and enjoy it I did! Giant beers for the drinking, veggie burgers for the non-cow eating, port-a-potties for everyone, amazing judging looks from hipsters in hippie headbands aimed uncomfortably at you for several minutes as they pass you by! It's all magical. Even in the rain.
You can see that AC1 owns actual galoshes. My hunting boots are MOLD PROOF! and lasted the day out nicely, gathering roughly 1/3 of Zilker onto themselves which was more recently washed down my shower drain and into the plumbing system of my apartment building.
AC1 will have more to add about our adventures I am certain, as well as pictures of the sexy outfits we wore around the park. Imagine our mad dancing to Raveonettes (well, we were busy drinking our first 24oz beers at that point, so we were dancing only in our heads really) and Girl Talk dressed up so.
Naturally we were also inspired to start our own band (a highly unique enterprise in Austin, may I assure you) and happily my friend Elizabetsy can play not only the piano and the flute, but also the accordion. She is so in our band.